Wednesday, January 14, 2009

When we found out.

I had my first ultrasound on December 10, 2008, oh how excited i was. When we got there the tech done the usual: measured the baby and that stuff, then she said you are having a baby boy!! I was soo excited. She let me go to the bathroom, when i came out the doctor was in the room with us, i knew something was wrong because with my first pregnancy the doctor didn't come in. He said "there may be something wrong, your baby's head look abnormal." of course i thought maybe downs syndrome or something. So when they set me up for my level II ultrasound i prepared myself for that. When the specialist at UAMS came in he held my hand and said " hunny i'm sorry to tell you that your baby has a very rare defect called anencephaly. With anencephaly he will not live long after birth." i started crying my eyes out. I was not prepared for this, then he went on to explain what anencephaly was. During this time i cried and cried. I called my husband and told him, because we weren't thinking that there was something major, he did not take off of work, tho now i wish he did. Well I went home, where all i could do is cry. If you have ever been in this situation, you know how i felt, and how i still feel. Well i am due May 15, and i am very very scared for this day to get here.

This was the beginning of our journey with anencephaly.