Tuesday, August 18, 2009


Has it really already been 4 months???Sunday My little boy would have turned 4 months. It has gone by so fast, but seems like it has been forever since I have held him. I miss him so much. I long to hold him. I have had a hard time lately trying to cope with all of this. And I know I shouldn't question God, but I do. I just want to know why it had to be my son. I am a good mommy and we have wonderful family. Why does it happen to the best of us? Everyone that I know that has lost a baby DID NOT DESERVE THIS..no one does..I just feel like screaming GIVE ME MY BABY BACK..but I know it wont do any good. The only thing that gets me through is knowing that I will see him again, and that he is safe in the arms of God!
I love all of you, my wonderful, sweet friends!!


  1. I know that I having the hope of seeing Carleigh again makes this journey just a little more bearable. (((hugs))) hun!!

  2. I can't wait til we all get to see our babies in Heaven.

  3. Nothing wrong with questioning (in my opinion). To me its only normal to question why us when crappy mothers are given healthy babies every single day!
    ((hugs)) 4 months is a short time...Its been almost 4 years for me and its a weird feeling. Miss Logan a lot, but I am not as sad as I used to be...well most of the time.

  4. Hi. I came here from TheBlogFrog and I read your story about little Seth. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I don't know what it's like to lose a child, but my husband committed suicide in '04, so I do know what it's like to grieve. Don't let people judge you and tell you when they think you need to get over it. I had one person tell me that I seemed too happy! Can you imagine? I was trying to be strong for my six kids and I was too happy? Go figure. Just take one day at a time, and as you know, day by day, things WILL be better. The pain will always be there, but it will decrease as time goes by. When my husband died, my mother asked, "But why you, Jen?" I said, "Mom, why not me?" Life is hard, but we can grow from these types of experiences. I know I have and you are a strong person and will grow, too, I know it. God bless you!