Today, I had a telephone interview with a lady from the Arkansas Children's hospital, center of Birth Defects. They sent me a letter to complete, and send back to them a few weeks ago, If I wanted to participate in a study, and I said why not, maybe this could benefit someone. Anyway, The lady called, and the interview was set up for today. It was about my pregnancy with my sweet Seth, 3 months befpre, and 3 months after. And the VERY FIRST question was...."is your son still alive? I was like really?? this was stated in the papers that I sent to you already.. Anyways, with tears in my eyes, I simply said, no, no he isn't. And most of the questions after that made me cry. Needless to say, this interview has made for a very emotional day. I miss him so, so much. And night time get to me more than anything. Night time is the only time tyhat I have quiet time, to actually sit and think, abiut the things that have happened in my life, both good and bad. And I must say, of all of the things that have happened, losing my son, is definately the one that has not gotten easier, and I know, it will never get any easier. It still feels the same as the day we say,"see you soon, sweet Seth"
Well, sweet friends of mine, it is time I turn in for the night.. my sweet rainbow is tired..
God Bless you ALL!